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My experiences of being a birth child in a fostering household

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Phoebe shares her insights into living in a fostering household. From the age of 17, Phoebe's parents decided they wanted to become foster carers, and ever since this happened, Phoebe has embraced life with other children living in her home; here, you can read how she has found adapting to life as a fostering family. 


Tell me a bit about yourself 

I am 21 years old and currently work with families across Suffolk and Norfolk in 2 different job roles. I love a good book and also love going on family walks with our three-legged dog.

When my family started fostering, I was 17. By then, I was already working part-time and studying.


How did it make you feel having a child you didn’t know live in your home?

At first, with every new child coming into your home, it can feel slightly strange as you are getting used to a new person you do not currently know living within your home. However, in no time, I get to know them well, and it becomes a lot less awkward.


Did it affect your relationship with your family? Did anything change? 

Becoming a foster family has added so much to our family. It’s made our house a whole lot more fun and noisy! My parents still make sure that everyone in the house is loved, cared for, and accepted, so it hasn’t changed that. Of course, the dynamics of family life change when you foster. People’s time has to be divided up, but that is all part of fostering.


How have you helped children living in your home? What support have you given?

I have been able to bake alongside children, showing them the importance of life skills and making delicious food! I’ve used my own life experiences to help and support children.


Tell us about a great memory of living in a fostering household?

I love Christmas time with foster children. You get to share your own family traditions with them and hear some of their traditions, which is lovely. The best memory was getting on the Christmas train, seeing all the Christmas lights, and experiencing the joy, excitement, and fun of Christmas with a child.


What are the challenges that come with living in a fostering household?

Like anything, it has its ups and downs. It can be hard to hear you might be having a child come and live with us and then not have those children come and live with you. Equally, some children have to move on from living with you - which can be very sad. However, Nexus Fostering has supported my family through these transitions. 


What advice would you give to birth children living in a fostering household who might be new to fostering?

Continue having special moments with your parents; it is really important to remember to spend time with them. You should also be open and honest with your parents about how you are feeling throughout your time as a fostering household.


How have you found the support from Nexus Fostering? 

Nexus Fostering has been amazing at supporting everyone in my family! There are many training opportunities available for everyone to help support you, and you are encouraged to ask if there is extra training you would like to complete. 


Find out more about the support your family receives when you are fostering with Nexus Fostering - Training & Support | Nexus Fostering 


Fostering stories


  • Advice
  • Young person
  • Teenager
  • Foster Carer
  • Birth child(ren)

Date published

22 March 2024

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